The Fellas at the Freakin' FCC is a song sung by Peter, Brian, Stewie Griffin in "PTV". In it, the trio illustrates their disdain for the Federal Communications Commission's censorship of vulgar content and crude language in media.
In "Brian & Stewie", Brian and Stewie did a clip show of some of the best musical numbers of the series. As they led into the FCC song, Stewie went on a tangent about how in real life, the FCC loved the musical number, complaining about how they laughed at an insult that was intended to offend them. Due to Stewie's extensive rant, Brian said that they no longer had time to play the song and the show ended abruptly right then and there.
Peter (Speaking): Oh yeah, I know all about the FCC!
Peter: They will clean up all your talking in a manner such as this.
Brian: They will make you take a tinkle when you want to take a piss.
Stewie: And they'll make you call fellatio a trouser-friendly kiss.
Peter/Brian/Stewie: It's the plain situation! There's no negotiation!
Peter: With the fellas at the freakin' FCC!
Brian: They're as stuffy as the stuffiest of special interest groups.
Peter: Make a joke about your bowels and they order in the troops.
Stewie: Any baby with a brain could tell them everybody poops!
Peter/Brian/Stewie: Take a tip, take a lesson! You'll never win by messin'
Peter: With the fellas at the freakin' FCC.
And if you find yourself with some young sexy thing.
You're gonna have to do her with your ding-a-ling.
Cause you can't say penis!
So they sent this little warning they're prepared to do their worst,
Brian: And they stuck it in your mailbox hoping you could be coerced.
Stewie: I can think of quite another place they should have stuck it first!
Peter/Brian/Stewie: They may just be neurotic or possibly psychotic.
They're the fellas at the freakin' FCC!
- The song is set to the tune of "Volunteer Fireman's Picnic" from the 1950's musical, "Take Me Along".