Republican Town
Republican Town is a song sung by Brian, Rush Limbaugh, and even Lois in "Excellence in Broadcasting".


Brian: I dream of Republican Town,
Where men to the right of the aisle don't back down.
The streets are aglow with the smell of apple pies
And babies come out of the womb in coats and ties.
Nice place, huh, Rush?
Rush: It's a paradise, Brian.
Trees grow from Republican sod.
And everyone prays to a proper right-wing God.
Lois: Republican Catholics?
Brian: Yes, indeed, there are!
Lois: Republican Muslims?
Rush: Now, let's not go too far.
Lois: No Muslims?
Rush: Eh, too many tall buildings.
Brian: They've outlawed all abortions,
Late or early.
It's a sin we can't abide.
Lois: What if you find a fetus
Left abandoned?
Rush: We just take it
And we jam it back inside.
Brian: Oh, yes, 'cause I dream of Republican Town,
The place where the happiest smile is Cheney's frown.
Rush: I'll bet you a buck you won't find a damn thing wrong
'Cause when you come down to it,
This is where we all belong.
Lois: Who else lives here?
Brian: Oh, big names, Lois.
We're watching Republican stars.
Rush: Like sweet Mickey Rourke, and his gorgeous right-wing scars.
Brian: Chuck Norris is one.
Rush: And he's got a right-wing beard.
Brian: Jon Voight is another.
Rush: He's just right-wing weird.
Brian: His, uh, his daughter's pretty hot, though.
Rush: At one time, Brian. At one time.
Lois: But how 'bout global warming?
Brian: It's a snow job
By Obama and his crew.
Lois: But aren't all his findings
Backed by science?
Rush: Careful, Lois,
Now you're sounding like a Jew!
Brian: Oy!
We dream of Republican Town,
Where Clinton is viewed as a crazy Commie clown.
Rush: A place where America's growing free and strong.
Brian: 'Cause when you come down to it,
This is where
All: We

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