Peter's Def Jam

Peter's Def Jam
	Season 14, Episode 19
Air date	January 24, 2016
	List of Episodes
Previous; The Monitor Monitor	Next; The Peter Principal

Peter's Def Jam is the 19th episode of the fourteenth season of Family Guy. It's the 341st episode, overall.

Synopsis[]

The guys try to start a podcast, but Peter goes solo and branches out as a DJ. Meanwhile, back at the Griffin home, Lois’ allergy forces Brian to move into Stewie’s bedroom and the two have roommate difficulties.

Plot[]

The guys decide to turn their Drunken Clam bull sessions into a podcast called Thanks for the Clamories, but when Cleveland's ramblings wear them out. Trying again, Peter's difficulties with running their computer after a particularly distasteful discussion result in a music mix and they are invited to DJ at a club.

After the act becomes a success, the club owner encourages Peter to branch out on his own at the Electric Clam Festival, but his dumping of the guys doesn't go over well. When waking up after an extra-loud rehearsal, he finds he is deaf. He turns to the guys for help, but is rebuffed at first, but after they reconsider, they agree to stick by his side and help them. But without being able to hear the sound selection, Peter runs an audio book and they blow the gig. Back at the Clam, Peter reveals that his deafness was caused by stuffing Oxycontin in his ears while Joe struggles to play video games.

Meanwhile, Lois suffers from allergies and decides to force Brian to sleep with Stewie, who looks forward to the arrangement. But when Brian's slovenly habits and manners get on his nerves, he tries to drive him out by getting a ferret. As they start to fight, Lois intervenes and lets them know that things are back to normal, her allergies caused by Peter stuffing the pillowcases full of straw, cartoon-style. As Stewie and Brian reconcile, Stewie is attacked by the ferret and they struggle to kill it.

Characters[]

Major Roles[]

Minor Roles[]

Quotes[]

Peter: Hey, do you think homeless people ever have sеx with each other?

Cleveland: Probably. But I don't want to think about it.

Joe: I know for a fact they do. I spend most of my day breaking up in-progress homeless sеx.

Cleveland: I bet it stink.

Joe: Oh, it stink all right.

Quagmire: So, we talking group stuff or just one-on-one?

Joe: Oh, anything goes. Whatever you can fit under a tarp. There's a major hot spot behind the Dumpster at The Cheesecake Factory.

Peter: Hey, what's up with the menus at The Cheesecake Factory? Why they got to be so freakin' big?

Quagmire: Yeah, and why does their menu have ads? I go there for dinner with my wife, not to shop for appliances.

[Meg walks into the room with a buzz cut]

Meg: I said damn, what a wild couple of days. Anyways, sup with you guys?

Chris: Sorry amigo, not interested.

Lois: I'm gonna go take a shower, so I can blow my nose into my hands.

[Lois crashes into a wall]

Lois: Ow! Dammit! I hate this house.

[Peter walks in as Lois leaves]

Peter: Morning, honey.

Lois: [offscreen] Go to Hell!

Peter: That was worse than an Italian guy, describing someone's sexuality.

[Cutaway to Peter at an Italian dinner]

Italian Guy: Anyway, my brother Louie, he's uh...he's a little off to the side, you know? Uh, foofy. Uh, up to the knuckle. He's uh...he's a backwards mechanic, likes to play in the dirt.

Peter: You mean gay?

Italian Mom: No! [starts crying]

Italian Guy: Ma ma! Come on, Peter! Ma ma, Louie's not gay, he's ... he's creative.

Stewie: Hey what are we gonna do tonight? Ooh, maybe we should watch that movie about Freud where Michael Fassbender repeatedly spanks Keira Knightley to orgasm.

Brian: You saw that movie?

Stewie: I saw that scene.

Stewie: You certainly can't be any worse than the last roommate I had.

[Cutaway to Peter sleeping in Stewie's crib with him]

Stewie: What the?

Peter: Please don't cry, she's already very angry at me.

Lois: [offscreen] Peter, where are you? You will wash your hands after you poop.

Peter: Shh. Shh. I won't.

[Joe is playing Golden Tee and is too short to see the screen]

Joe: How am I doing?

Peter: Good job, Joe. Hole in one. [to the others] He just keeps switching clubs.

[Peter is creating a song]

Peter: Hmm, still a trace of melody. I'll just add some power tools. [adds power tool sound effects] Yeah, yeah, I'd drink vodka and Gatorade to that.

Lois: Peter, since when are you a DJ?

Peter: Since some guy came in the clam and heard my awesome jams and beats.

Chris: Well, he's got the lingo down.

Peter: Thanks, Chris. NOW SCREAM!

Chris: AAAAAAAAAAH!

Stewie: Who's this turd?

Brian: Oh, this is Georgie.

Stewie: Brian, I never said you could have guests.

[Stewie tries to grab Georgie's backpack]

Georgie: HEY, DON'T TOUCH THAT! [quickly grabs his backpack]

Stewie: Okay, red flags flying.

Lois: Brian, there you are. I wanted to tell you, you could come back and sleep in our room?

Brian: What? I can?

Lois: Yeah, turns out it was Peter, who was causing my allergies. He stuffed all our pillows with hay because he thought it looked comfortable in cartoons.

Trivia[]

Taken from the root word 'definitive', numerous sources cite Def Jam Records of popularizing the term in hip hop music.[1]
Flea's retort of him mentioning that he was 54 and not 50 was an ad-lib. [2]
Kenny Rogers' "The Gambler" is the lead track in Peter's accidental mix at The Drunken Clam.
The end theme is replaced by a mix of quotes from the show including Lois' "Who wants Chowder?" from "8 Simple Rules for Buying My Teenage Daughter", "Butt scratcher", "No-no-no-no-no!" from Cleveland's Bathtub Gag, "laugh and cry" from the Theme Song, Brian's "Whose leg do you have to hump to get a dry martini around here?" and many others.
Joe plays Golden Tee Golf and Big Buck Hunter.
Tom Sizemore's downhill career trajectory is mocked.
Peter watches a Garfield cartoon.
Peter spells out messages with Alpha-Bits.
The audiobook that Peter plays is Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea by Chelsea Handler.[3]

Cultural References[]

The guys used to rob banks dressed as lesser-known presidents, a Point Break reference.[4]
Mickey Mouse tells guests on a Disney cruise not to eat the shrimp. This is a reference to the norovirus outbreak on the Wonder in 2016.[5]
The Keira Knightley - Michael Fassbender film Stewie refers to is A Dangerous Method.
The fourth-graders fight gag originated in Ron and Fez.[6]

Peter's Def Jam
Season 14, Episode 19

Air date	January 24, 2016
List of Episodes
Previous The Monitor Monitor	Next The Peter Principal