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Love Story Guy

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Love Story Guy
Season 21, Episode 20
Air date February 5, 2023
Episode Guide
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Love Story Guy is the 20th episode of the twenty first season of Family Guy. It is the 524th episode, overall.

Synopsis[]

The Beer Bar Buddies recount their first true love stories, leading to parodies of Castaway, Dirty Dancing, and various Meg Ryan rom-coms.

Plot[]

Framing Device[]

Peter arrives late at The Drunken Clam, telling his pals about how Brian had to say goodbye to his first love. The others comment on how first loves always hit the hardest, which gives them the idea to start telling stories about their first loves. Once the stories are done, Cleveland asks if he can tell his own story after being pressured to by Donna. The guys instead try to fake hearing his story, but Donna is not buying it.

Castaway[]

Quagmire's story involves him as a FedEx worker, with Helen Hunt as his fiancé. Three days before their wedding, however, his delivery plane crash lands after flying into a storm and getting struck by lightning. Marooned on an uncharted island, Quagmire roots through the discarded packages and bonds with a volleyball, whom he names Rita Wilson. He slowly starts to go insane after being stranded for four years, so he decides to escape to the mainland, using some of the spare cardboard as a raft. After going days without food and losing Wilson to another storm, he is soon rescued, only for the ship to be commandeered by Somali pirates. Fast-forwarding past this, Quagmire returns home, only to find that Helen has moved on and gotten back with Paul Reiser. Heartbroken, he walks off into the rain.

Dirty Dancing[]

Joe envisions himself as a dance instructor for Jewish senior citizens, with one of his students, Jennifer Schnozz, taking an interest in him. When his current dance partner, Dancy McGee, has to leave to treat her TMJ, Joe is left without a partner for the upcoming camp talent show. However, Jennifer steps up to the plate and he reluctantly agrees to teach her how to dance. Despite the difficulty that comes with practice, the two end up falling in love, but when Jennifer's father, Dr. Hartman, blames Joe for Dancy's injury, he is forbidden from dancing with her ever again. Nonetheless, Joe stands up to him on the night of the talent show and enjoys a triumphant dance with Jennifer, before explaining how he got her pregnant afterwards, only for her to receive jaw surgery.

Meg Ryan rom-coms[]

Peter flashes back to 1989, where he sees When Harry Met Sally at the theater and falls in love with Meg Ryan. Vowing to see everything she ever appears in, he goes to watch another one of her movies, only for her to break the fourth wall and beckon him into the screen. When they first talk, they agree to just be friends, but it doesn't stop Peter from following her across many of her future shows and movies, often taking up the roles of other characters. Eventually, the two wind up acting out In The Cut and end up confessing their love, only for the whole thing to just be a dream, with Peter having fallen asleep in the theater while masturbating.

Characters[]

Major Roles[]

Minor Roles[]

Quotes[]

Trivia[]

  • Lois, Chris and Meg do not appear in this episode.
  • Peter arrives late to The Drunken Clam due to a family emergency, although for a moment he can barely remember it, only knowing that it involved Brian.
    • Cleveland suggests he discuss it over beer, which jogs Peter's memory.
  • Joe states that he could not find anything pertaining to Spectrum Originals on the internet.
  • Both Peter and Cleveland intended to tell their stories last, only for Joe to declare it Peter's turn, which annoys Cleveland.
  • Peter was once told by his doctor that he cannot drink and do Ambien.
  • Peter briefly wonders if his first love was Meg Ryan or Melanie Griffith.

Cast Away[]

  • Quagmire constantly mentions the place he makes deliveries for, FedEx; the film was notorious for its heavy FedEx product placement.
  • Quagmire is unable to spear a fish with a stick, a fact that is mentioned several times.
  • Quagmire likes his women to look like "pissy birds."
  • Quagmire's plane crashed because he was juggling two fantasy football games at once.
  • One of the discarded FedEx packages contained a fake peanut brittle jar mailed by Peter Griffin as an interruption to the story.
    • The gag is repeated later when one of the boxes looks to contain a sailboat.
    • Peter attempts to prank Quagmire a third time by placing another fake jar into the ocean, but this time Quagmire does not fall for it.
  • Quagmire claims that he praised Tom Hanks' wife, Rita Wilson, in order for Hanks to let him parody Cast Away.
  • Quagmire learns how to spear a fish and stops caring about time, which he describes as character development.
  • One of the discarded packages contains three deflated footballs that were meant to be mailed to Tom Brady.
  • Quagmire meets a random guy in a sailboat upon escaping the island, but is in no mood to chat with him after seeing him defecate into the sea.
    • In the same scene, he mentions boning the volleyball, marking the second time Family Guy has joked about this.
  • Helen Hunt mentions filming a Mad About You reboot with Paul Reiser, released on Spectrum Originals. Quagmire interrupts the story to rant about how no one watched it.
  • Quagmire claims he has not thought about Helen at all since the breakup, after portable porn was invented five years after the fact.

Dirty Dancing[]

  • The camp where Joe instructs is known for only teaching child-appropriate dance moves.
    • However, at night, someone brings a watermelon to the staff cabin, prompting everyone to start dirty dancing.
  • The dirty dancing nights are often interrupted by mosquitoes, due to it being August near a lake.
  • Joe describes Dancy McGee as the best dancer on the staff, despite her not dancing any better or worse than her colleagues.
  • Jennifer lies about being ticklish on her inner arms, which ends up getting in the way during dance practice.
    • Dancy is revealed to have the same quirk later, much to Joe's chagrin.
  • Jennifer hints at being seventeen and thus underaged, but Joe blatantly ignores her. In reality, the age of consent is 17 in New York.
  • Joe is implied to have peed in the lake during their water-dancing lessons.
  • The man who alerts Joe to Dancy's illness is developmentally disabled and only knows how to say, "Joe, come quick, it's Dancy!"
  • Dancy's jaw procedure included the use of a coat hanger, which proved useful in turning on the nearby TV.
  • Dr. Hartmann always takes a large bag of medical supplies with him while on vacation.
  • Joe is unable to explain how Jennifer is like the wind, even when pressed by Quagmire.

Meg Ryan sitcoms[]

  • Peter mentions several bad comedies of 1989: Troop Beverly Hills, Fletch Lives and Gleaming the Cube. Peter thought that When Harry Met Sally... was a sequel to Harry and the Hendersons.
  • Peter describes Meg Ryan as a woman who looks like the Full House baby.
  • Billy Crystal's hosting of the Oscars and the song parodies he did is alluded to.
  • Peter credits himself as the first person to ever say "Schwing!" but also states that he doesn't care who takes credit for it. In reality, it was first used by Mike Meyers and Dana Carvey in the Wayne's World skits on Saturday Night Live.
  • While seeing the second Meg Ryan movie, Peter intentionally eats half of his popcorn and tosses the rest onto the floor for the cleaners.
  • The "Joe, come quick, it's Dancy!" guy briefly cameos in Peter's story, witnessing his disappearance into the film.
  • Meg Ryan refers to Peter as the first person to say, "So that happened."
  • Peter uses an enormous 1990s laptop.[1]

Cultural References[]

  • In Quagmire's story parodying Cast Away, he unloads a parcel addressed to Tom Brady containing deflated footballs in reference to "Deflategate" additionally a text saying "This joke was written by a butthurt Seahawks fan" references when the New England Patriots defeated the Seattle Seahawks in Super Bowl XLIX.
  • Quagmire briefly hallucinates getting home and moving on with a new woman, only to spot a human version of Wilson playing piano at a club, in a reference to La La Land.
  • Joe Swanson in this story takes on the role of Patrick Swayze's character Johnny Castle from Dirty Dancing.
  • Jennifer Schnozz in Joe's story is a reference to Jennifer Grey, who portrayed Frances Houseman; her name is a reference to Grey's large nose.
  • Dancy McGee in Joe's story similarly is based on Cynthia Rhodes and her character Penny Johnson.
  • When Peter and Stewie reenact the ending of Sleepless in Seattle, at the top of the Empire State Building you can hear ticking sounds from backpacks left all over the top floor which references terror attacks in New York City in the early 90s.
  • After it was revealed Peter was dreaming he says he "Pee-Wee Hermanned himself" with his pants undone in reference to the actor Paul Rubens getting caught in 1991 masturbating in a adult movie theater.
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