Abraham Lincoln Takes Out His Cellphone
The Lincoln Assassination is an event that happened in April 14, 1865, when Abraham Lincoln was shot dead at Ford's Theater, by John Wilkes Booth.


Mind Over Murder

A Mentos commercial featured John Wilkes Booth using the power of Mentos to help him track down Abraham Lincoln and kill him. Booth shot Abraham Lincoln in the hat and Lincoln playfully wagged his finger at him. Lois said that those kinds of commercials were so stupid and certainly didn't make her want to buy Mentos. Peter stood up, hypnotized, saying that he was going to kill Abraham Lincoln.

Tales of a Third Grade Nothing

John Wilkes Booth tries to watch a play at Ford's Theater, but Abraham Lincoln's stupid tall hat is blocking his view. To make it worse, Lincoln laughs extremely loud and comments on everything that happens in the play, ruining the experience for Booth. The last straw is quickly picked, when Abraham Lincoln takes out his cellphone and starts talking to his friend in the middle of the show. John Wilkes Booth gets fed up with this and pulls his gun on him, cueing the historical incident.

Yug Ylimaf

Brian takes Cindy back in time to April 14th, 1865 and has sex with her in Ford's Theater. Her orgasm cry times up perfectly with the screams of the terrified theatergoers, when they witness Lincoln's assassination, so nobody even notices that they duo of sexhavers are there.

Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.