Chris and Peter Get Married
Fresh Heir is an episode of Family Guy.


Chris and Peter get married.


Chris wants to spend some time with Peter but he blows him off. When Carter breaks his leg at the mall, Babs needs someone to watch over him while she goes out of town and Lois can't do it either. When Meg turns taking care of him, Chris is stuck with the job. However, Chris and Carter hit it off and Carter makes Chris the sole heir to the family fortune. Chris is reluctant to accept the money which makes him even better in Carter's eyes. Peter is upset that Carter wants to leave the money to Chris and vows to suck up to Chris to get closer to the money.

He tries dressing like Chris and pandering to typical teenage likes. When that doesn't work, he engages in a series of stunts that fail. At the Drunken Clam, the guys note that Peter looks exhausted but feel good for Chris, hoping that whatever gal or guy he meets makes him happy. Peter gets an idea and proposes a Vermont gay marriage to Chris that night. Peter reveals that he got Lois to sign a divorce agreement as Chris decides to pursue the wedding in order to force Peter to spend time with him.

As they drive up to Vermont, Chris notes all of the preparations they have to make such as the gift registry and reception dance. On the wedding day, Lois interrupts the ceremony to tell Peter he is doing wrong. Chris stops her to tell her about having fun spending time with his dad and reveals he knew all along it was for the money. Chris and Peter agree to settle for being father and son and they return home.


Major Roles

Minor Roles


Chris: There's a three day weekend coming up and I thought maybe you and I could go fishing, like we've been talking about.
Peter: Aw, sorry, Chris. I can't. I promised a fish we'd do Chrising later.
[Cutaway to Peter "Chrising" with a fish; Peter catches Chris Farley]
Peter: Whoa-hoa! I caught a big one!
Fish: A Farley. Nice. Uhp. I got one too.
[Fish catches Chris Brown]
Fish: Oh my God, it's a Brown!
Peter: Holy cow. Now be careful. Those things punch you if you get too close. Oh. I think I got another one!
[Peter catches Chris Chan]
Peter: Huh? Well, I've never heard of this before.
Chris Chan: I'm the true and honest creator of Sonichu.
Fish: [frightened] Put it back.
Peter: What?
Fish: Actually, kill it, and then throw it back.
Peter: Why?
Fish: Just do that, and you'll make the Ocean of Chrises a better place.
Chris Chan: My favorite shows are Gilligan's Island and Family Guy.
Peter: Yuck. Family Guy. You watch that crap? Yeah, this guy has poor taste.

Meg: So, are you gunna go take care of him, mom?
Lois: I can't go. I've gotta go get my hair very minutely changed and spend the next fourteen hours trying to get people to notice.
[Cutaway to Lois getting her hair very minutely changed and spending the next fourteen hours trying to get people to notice]
Lois: Well?
Peter: Lois, move! You're blocking the TV.
Lois: [chuckles] What do you think?
Peter: I think you're blocking the TV.
Lois: Peter, is there anything you wanna say to me?
Peter: [sigh] Alright, Amy at work kissed me. It is true that I did not step away, but I did not lean in. However, in my defense, she had recently gotten her hair done differently.

Chris: Sucks about your leg, grandpa. How you been doing?
Carter: Awful, Chris. I can't go outside. I can't sleep. I just have to lie here and wait for my stupid leg to heal. And the worst part about it is I can't have sex. Do you know what it's like to go an entire day without sex?
Chris: [sarcastic] Yeah, can you imagine 13 years, without sex?
Carter: God, I wish there was a way I could just do it myself. You know, just-just to be done and napping within four minutes.
Chris: [smug] I think I know something you might like.
[Time lapse to Carter leading back in bed, pleasured]
Carter: That ... was ... AMAZING! And Linda Carter wasn't actually here?
Chris: No, that was just in your mind!
Carter: Incredible! Too bad you can only do that once a year.
Chris: Once a year? Grandpa, you can do it more often than that.
Carter: You can!?
Chris: Yeah. You can basically do it, whenever you're not doing something else.
Carter: Cool! Hey, next time I wanna try it with my own hand.

Brian: Look, Carter. I suppose you're entitled to do what you want, but, I'm just saying if it were me, I'd give the money to charity.
Carter: [annoyed] Oh my God.
Brian: What? I'm serious.
Carter: Sure, you are.
Brian: I am.
Carter: I'm sure.
Brian: I am wha-what's going on here? What are you mad about?
Carter: You're trying to make yourself look good.
Brian: No, I'm not. This is seriously, what I would do.
Carter: Shut up.
Brian: If I had that kind of money-
Carter: [sarcastic] Hey, everyone. Check out Michael Bloomberg over here.
Brian: Michael Bloomberg?
Carter: What a frickin' philanthropist.
Brian: That's your comparison?
Carter: [mocking] He's gunna donate all his money to charity.
Brian: Al-Alright, you don't believe me?
Carter: 'Course I don't believe you. I bet you can't even name any charities.
Brian: Sure ... you know. There's the green ... book-g-green book foundation. It-
Carter: The green book foundation. Never heard.
Brian: It-It-It helps the poor ... autistic ... whales, with ... AIDS ... and gun violence ... by protecting them from ... polar bears ... hurricanes ... and pedophiles ... with cancer.
Carter: You are such a fraud.
[Cutaway to a whale, wearing a hat that reads "Please Be Patient I Have Autism" and a red ribbon badge; holding a gun in one hand and a green book in the other; a polar bear is roaring and clawing at him on one side, and on the other side, a pedophile with cancer is in a "Free Candy" van, floating in the water on the other side; above him is a raging hurricane and a flaming meteor shower]
Whale: Why won't anybody help us?

Chris: Mumbling while asleep to indicate dream content.

Peter: Chris, there comes a time in every man's life, when he looks at his son and thinks, "I wanna take this to the next level." [Gets down on his knee and presents a wedding ring] Chris Griffin, will you marry me?
Chris: What!? Is it even legal for a man to marry his son?
Peter: It is in Vermont, as long as it's a man and a man, everything goes up there. They're a bunch of liberal degenerates.

Kevin: No, dad.
Joe: I don't know what normal is anymore.


  • The title is a pun on the phrase "Fresh Air".
  • Babs is a model for Veins Magazine, which is a fashion magazine featuring people who's legs show off very big and bulging veins.
  • Peter tells Chris that he'll give him a billion dollars if he leaves him alone and Chris gladly accepts. However, when Carter gives Chris money later in the episode, he turns it down.
  • Carter puts Chris in his will.
  • Chris and Meg take baths together.
  • Peter proposes to Chris and they officially become a couple that goes on dates, has sex, and even gets close to marrying before they finally decide to break up.
  • Peter tricks Lois into divorcing him, so that he can marry Chris.
  • This episode received extremely poor reviews for heavily involving father/son incest between Peter and Chris as part of it's main plot line, as well as the inclusion of a gag where Chris and Meg take baths together. It also received backlash for the fact that Peter and Chris' incestuous marriage was a stand-in for gay marriage and the moral of the episode was that what they were doing was wrong, making this an anti-LGBT episode. But mostly, however, this episode was mainly disliked just because it wasn't fucking funny.

Cultural References

  • Peter and a fish go "Chrising", and catch Chris Farley, Chris Brown, and Chris Chan.
    • When the fish catches Chris Farley, he says that it's a "big one", making fun of the latter for being fat.
    • When catching Chris Brown, Peter warns the fish that he'll punch him, referencing to how Chris Brown is guilty of domestic abuse.
    • When Peter catches Chris Chan, the latter mentions how he is the creator of "Sonichu" (a portmanteau of Sonic the Hedgehog and Pikachu), referencing to how Chris Chan combined two copyrighted characters and made them into a character that he calls his own.
  • Peter and Chris meet up in front of a movie theater, showing The Sorrow and The Pity.
  • Chris Chan says that his favorite shows are Gilligan's Island and Family Guy.
    • Since this joke was made in Family Guy, itself. This technically makes Chris Chan's comment a fourth wall joke, followed by Peter self-deprecating by saying how shitty of a show Family Guy is.
  • The scene where Peter and Chris met up with a different son and father, respectively is a parody on the Woody Allen movie, Annie Hall, which Peter explicitly states.
  • Peter mentions how Woody Allen married his daughter, Soon-Yi Previn.

Deleted Scenes

  • Backpacking through Europe with a bowl-legged man in short shorts.
  • Peter's insanity practice.
  • Peter forming an unspoken bond.
  • Carter says something about a cart carrying around a bunch of black people.
  • Meg talking about how Carter punched her in one of her "hogans".
  • Peter checking on his hairless twin.
  • Lois and Chris talking about farts.
  • Chris telling Lois not to tell her she loves him in front of his posters.
  • Lois saying that if Chris killed himself, she'd fabricate stories about him having a mental illness, and then deciding, she could do that.
  • Chris and Carter ordering two different pizzas and making them race.
  • Carter and Chris starting a band and getting mad at a band mate for being late.
  • Peter's hairless twin escaping his shed.
  • Peter tells Lois that he wants Chris' money, while misusing the word "perk".
  • A cutaway about "balls-heimers" disease.
  • Peter coming up with an over complicated handshake.
  • The director's cut of Mission Impossible 5, with the step stools not edited out.
  • Peter showing Chris the movie, Meatballs.
  • Quagmire and Joe watching some kind of television program called "At the Movies with Two Guys Who Watch the Films on their I-Phones".
  • Peter thinking about a cat playing the tuba.
  • Peter telling Chris that men and women only got married for all of human history except for the last five months.
  • Peter making some stupid comment about Will Smith and a pitbull.
  • Peter planning a post-wedding Sunday dinner with some guy at a Trattoria.
  • Chris and Peter fucking around at Peter's Dance Class.
  • Peter writes his own vow.
  • Stewie says that the photographer is obsessed with him.
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