Chris Has Got a Date, Date, Date, Date, Date

Chris Has Got a Date, Date, Date, Date, Date is an episode of Family Guy.

Synopsis

Plot

TBA

Characters

Major Roles

Minor Roles

Songs

Quotes

Peter: Alright, red light. Time to text and shave and whittle and floss.

Stewie: You've just gotta do what Taylor Swift does and shake it off.

Chris: Who's Taylor Swift?

[Stewie pauses in shock]

Stewie: Oh my God! Am I about to introduce you to Taylor Swift?

Chris: What is she, a singer?

Stewie: She's much more than a singer, Chris. She's ... she's ... she's the queen! A goddess! A gazelle in a high-waisted swimsuit!

[Peter fills out a form]

Peter: Name ... Peter Griffin. Criminal history ... This section is optional. I will skip this.

Stewie: [talking to Taylor Swift] Okay, so let's talk about Harry Styles. Now, you don't have to say anything. I'm just gonna slowly pull out this tape measure, and you indicate when I should stop. Okay, here I go.

[Stewie starts pulling out the tape measure]

Stewie: Still going ... still going ... Oh my God, you bitch! Seriously?

Chris: Taylor, this is our sister, Meg and our dog, Brian.

Taylor: Nice to meet you both.

Meg: We're not all so impressed. I've met Dan Aykroyd.

Brian: I'm sorry, uh, which cast member of Hee Haw are you?

[Stewie runs up and starts beating them with the tape measure]

Stewie: WILL YOU BE NICE!?

Chris: Sorry about my family.

Taylor: Don't apologize. They seem nice.

Chris: Well, you wouldn't say that if you ever saw in the movies.

[Cutaway the the family in a movie theater]

Peter: Alright, we got our popcorn from home, our soda from home, our snacks from home and Braveheart.

[Peter picks up a guy in his car]

Guy: Hey, what's up? I'm just going to Quahog Stadium.

Peter: Okay, would you like the AC on or the windows down?

Guy: How 'bout both?

Peter: Gasp!

[Peter excitedly drives with the AC on and the windows down]

Guy: Pretty great right?

Peter: It is! It really is! Thank you, genius person!

Guy: No problem. Hey, you ever go in a hot tub while it's snowing outside?

Peter: UH ... WHAT!?

Secretary: Ms. Swift, your song writing team is here.

[Two old Jewish guys walk in]

Mickey: We've got a socko tune for you, Taylor. Hit it, Morty. [singing] Lox and bagels and bagels and lox. I like being a girl. Glittery shoes with rainbow socks. I like being a girl.

Taylor: Okay, one thought. What if we changed "lox" to "boys" and "bagels" to "problems".

Morty: Oh, that's good! Like when you changed "Pickle it good" to "Shake it off".

[Chris, Brian, and Stewie appear in Taylor Swift's house]

Chris: Hi, Taylor.

Taylor: Chris? What are you guys doing here?

Chris: I wanted to talk to you.

Stewie: Your house is way nicer than Anne Murray's. We broke in there too.

Trivia

Stewie's Twitter account, "@StewGriff3", is an actual account as of October 2015. However, in real life, it was started by animation associate producer Brent Crowe.

Continuity

Meg references to the events of "Spies Reminiscent of Us", when she says she's met Dan Aykroyd before.
Stewie makes a callback to "Chris Cross", when he mentions breaking into Anne Murray's house.

Cultural References

The episode title references Taylor Swift's song "Shake it Off" that has several verses of similarly repeating melody.
Stewie's music video for Chris is a parody of Taylor Swift's "You Belong With Me".
"Self Esteem" by The Offspring plays as Peter arrives as a Lyft driver.
Peter dressed as a talk show host is a reference to Johnny Carson, the Tonight Show host. Tonight Show producer Fred de Cordova is listed as the producer in ending credits, and a Carson Entertainment style logo is shown.