Chris Griffin

Chris Griffin
Chris Griffin
Name	Christopher Cross Griffin
Age	13 (debut) 14 (as of Trading Places) 15 (as of Follow the Money)
Job(s)	Student at Buddy Cianci Junior High School (Season 1-Season 4) Student at James Woods Regional High School (Season 5-Present) Paperboy (To Love and Die in Dixie - Movin' Out (Brian's Song)) Quahog Mini-Mart (Movin' Out (Brian's Song) - present) Commission Artist (Peter Gets Served-Present)
Relatives	Peter Griffin (father) Lois Griffin (mother) Tmas Griffin (stillborn twin brother) Meg Griffin (half-sister) Stewie Griffin (younger brother) Brian Griffin (pet dog) Vinny Filipeli (pet dog; from "A Filler in Need" to "Christmas Guy") Babs Pewterschmidt (maternal grandmother) Carter Pewterschmidt (maternal grandfather) Carol West (maternal aunt) Patrick Pewterschmidt (maternal uncle) Mayor Adam West (maternal uncle) Karen Griffin (paternal aunt) Thelma Griffin (paternal grandmother; deceased) Francis Griffin (paternal adoptive grandfather; deceased) Mickey Mcfinnigan (biological grandfather) Bertram (genetic stepbrother; deceased)
Voice	Seth Green (primarily) Kevin Michael Richardson (while under the influence of mushrooms in "You May Now Kiss the Uh ... Guy Who Receives")

"I'm Chris. Sometimes I have to poop for a long time. Now you say something."

— Long John Peter

Christopher "Chris" Cross Griffin (born February 8, 1985) is a major protagonist in Family Guy. He is the son of Peter Griffin and Lois Griffin, the twin brother of Tmas Griffin, and middle child of the family, with Meg Griffin and Stewie Griffin being his older half-sister and younger brother, respectively.

Biography

Birth

Christopher Cross Griffin was born in Quahog, Rhode Island, as the second of three children, born to Peter Griffin and Lois Griffin. His conception happened the same way Meg did, through a broken condom. Though compared to the long complicated history with Meg, it happened with Peter and Lois only, with no third party in part, and Lois was planning to abort Chris as revealed in "Peter's Daughter", even drinking and smoking a lot up to the point where the day was coming. Though she chickened out of the abortion when it came, leading to Chris being born. When he was born, he was pretty obese and was so fat, Lois had to try extra hard just to squeeze him out of her vagina. After he was born, he had left her birth canal, way wider than it was before.

Infancy & Childhood

Unlike with Meg, Peter and Lois loved Chris when he was born and treated him with all the love and care that parents would give to a child. They still did bully him from time to time for being mentally disabled, but Chris was so dim it bounced off compared to when they abused Meg.

When Chris grew older, it was shown that he began to exhibit stupidity, dim-wittedness, and even retarded traits. Concerned, his parents had him tested to see if he had any mental illnesses, but all the tests showed that he did not have any known mental disorders, meaning that his dumb behavior is simply done out of his own stupidity. This stupidity was also thought to have been a genetic trait passed down to him by Peter, but since it didn't affect Meg and Stewie, it was concluded that the simple answer is that Chris is stupid.

Middle School

When Family Guy debuted in 1999, Chris was thirteen years old and was attending middle school at Buddy Cianci Jr. High School as an 8th grader for the first four seasons of the show. During his time there he was shown to struggle a lot as "If I'm Dyin', I'm Lyin'" showed him to be a C- to D student. Though compared to Meg, who was a social outcast and got bullied all the time, Chris was shown to be more well-liked by the students - as he had his own little friend circle with Jake Tucker, unnamed friends and Cleveland Jr. - and teachers - as shown with his friendship with Randall Fargus. The only expectation of Principal Sloan, as he's gotten in a good amount of trouble to be at his office way too much for him to admit.

Despite his troubling times of being send to the principal's office and mediocre grades, he was able to (somehow) push his grades up as revealed in "Fast Times at Buddy Cianci Jr. High" and was able to graduate from middle school in "Full Metal Jackass".

High School and Current Life

In the current day, Chris currently goes to high school at James Woods Regional High School, starting with Season 5, onwards. High school is a lot harder on Chris than middle school, not only academically, but also socially. Compared to middle school, Chris was treated like a social outcast a lot more in James Woods High and is made fun of and bullied for being overweight and kinda weird. He didn't fit in with any of the popular kids, specific cliques, or even the normal kids. So, he had to spend his time with the unpopular kids, which would be kids such as Neil Goldman, Friend #1, Friend #2, Jake Tucker, and Cleveland Jr. Although he is not as unpopular as his half-sister, Meg, he is dangerously close, which is why he needs to try his best to stay where he is and not sink any deeper.

When he's not in a battle in high school, he's dealing with obstacles like his job at the Quahog Mini-Mart.

Future

In "Stu and Stewie's Excellent Adventure", Chris's adult life saw him become a traffic cop and marry a woman named Vanessa. Who was a hateful, foul-mouthed hustler that belittled him and forced him to put Peter and Lois in a retirement home.

In "Rich Old Stewie", Chris' future became one of a poor old bum who lives in a crappy old trailer, having wasted his life playing such video games as Fortnite, World of Warcraft, and Club Penguin Rewritten instead of getting a life, finding a wife, working an actual job, or doing anything important lnot even using his art talent).

Appearance

Chris is an overweight teenage boy with long, shaggy blond hair and medium skin. He wears a blue t-shirt, black sweatpants, white sneakers with red stripes and an orange baseball cap with black on the back. His face looks similar his father's, having the same kind of eyes, nose and chin. In the first three seasons, he wore golden hoop earrings.

Personality

General

Chris is the sort of person who greets every day with a smile and enthusiasm. People often think of Chris as a younger version of his father, but he possesses more good qualities, such as being cheerful, kindhearted and intelligent, well-known for having a specific knowledge about TV shows, films, actors, actresses, tropes, techniques to making a film good or bad, etc. Despite this factor, Chris can be viewed as naive, being unaware of the fact that his fun personality has put him at the top of the popularity list at James Woods Regional High School, along with his half-sister Meg's rival Connie D'Amico, and her friends, Dustin and Gina. Chris mainly thrives on getting good grades, pulling off daring pranks, helping out his fellow classmates with his newfound social standing (and social know-how), and a lot of drawing, as he wants to become a famous artist someday. He draws so much that according to Lois, he has over five books worth of drawings made entirely by him in just three years alone.

He also has had numerous girlfriends throughout the series' run. Despite all this, he has had his share of trouble, such as unrequited crushes, insecurity about his weight and, as a running gag, constantly believing that there is an "Evil Monkey" in his bedroom closet. He has all sorts of interests, including comic books, playing the electric guitar, drawing, Mexican food and sports, particularly baseball. Chris is arguably the most diverse character in the franchise along with Stewie and Brian, and even has the unusual ability for a teenager to move throughout different social cliques at school without showing prejudice of any sort. Overall, Chris is the most fun-loving member of the Griffin family who is definitely NOT like other boys his age and hopes that the best years of his life will always be with him, as far as his family and friends are concerned.

Masturbation Habits

It's not secret Chris is frequent masturbator - even by the standards of teenage boys. In the first two seasons, there were small implications, but were most times mistakes. In "Holy Crap", grandfather Francis Griffin accuses Chris of masturbating when he was really just defecating by telling him that was he was doing in the bathroom was morally wrong and God can see it. And in "Running Mates", Peter hears a thumping sound coming from his room, only to find Chris was just playing with a paddleball. However, he was finally revealed to have a habit of doing it at least from time to time in "Between Sanity and Madness". Where Chris helped Francis - who completely forgot about the accusing in "Holy Crap" - blow off some sexual frustration he had by teaching him how to masturbate. And the two came down with ruffled hair and clothes, with the obvious implication.

Later however, flanderization hit Chris hard around seasons eight to sixteen and his chronic obsession with masturbating became much more played up. He has masturbated so heavily that according to Lois in "German Guy", he not only did it so much that his bedsheets are so encrusted with semen, but he also somehow made the washing machine pregnant. In "Farmer Guy", a cutaway gag he was shown giving a sock a pregnancy test and in "The (Not-So) Great Outdoors", Chris got caught jacking off to porn magazines in the bushes.

Masturbating takes up such a huge amount of time, brainpower, and manic energy from him that when he got chemically castrated in "An App a Day", he becomes an excellent student (albeit acquiring numerous bizarre mannerisms as a side effect). And even then, a single touch on the shoulder from a pretty girl is enough to instantly undo the drugs and leave him running through the school library desperately screaming for porn, ultimately jerking off in public over a nude art book in a mad craze in front of the librarian.

Artistic Talents

Despite his seemingly low intelligence and poor grades, Chris has proven to be capable in other areas of his life. With one such capability being his impressive aptitude towards the arts. He has shown to have an artistic ability, from drawing or painting great artwork, to even being able to sketch realistic portraits. Chris was such a great artist that he once almost managed to become a famous artist in New York but failed when he refused to estrange his family in "A Picture's Worth $1000". Despite refusing it, and the fact the artistic personality got more downplayed as time went on, he still showed to continue his love for art in many ways. Whether through doing commissions for money, having multiple art posters in his room.

Relationships

Family

• Peter Griffin -
• Lois Griffin -
• Meg Griffin -
• Stewie Griffin -
• Brian Griffin -
• Vinny Filipeli -
• Francis Griffin -
• Thelma Griffin -
• Karen Griffin -
• Heather Griffin -
• Carter Pewterschmidt -
• Babs Pewterschmidt -
• Carol West -

Friends

• John Herbert - Herbert the Pervert is a pedophile, who generally stalks Chris. Chris is stupidly oblivious to the fact that Herbert is trying to rape him, and he thinks he's just a good friend. Chris calls him "Mr. Herbert". Thankfully, Herbert has yet to molest Chris, and he hopefully never will, but Chris does get sexually harassed by him a lot.

Former Enemies

• Evil Monkey - Chris had an evil monkey, who lived in his closet. The monkey has given Chris nightmares, and has scared him, because he kept jumping out of his closet, and pointing at him, making an angry face The monkey finally left in "Hannah Banana", where it was revealed, he was actually a nice guy.

Friends

• Neil Goldman - Chris is friends with Neil.
• Cleveland Jr. - Chris is friends with Junior.
• Jake Tucker - Chris is friends with Jake.

Girlfriend

• Anna -

Episode Absences

Chris has appeared in every episode, except for the following:

• I Take Thee Quagmire
• Love, Blactually
• Brian and Stewie
• The Hand That Rocks the Wheelchair
• Mr. and Mrs. Stewie (Voice Only)
• Welcome Back, Carter
• Brian is a Bad Father
• Scammed Yankees
• The Dating Game
• Send in Stewie, Please
• Tales of Former Sports Glory
• Love Story Guy

Trivia

• Chris' full name, Christopher Cross Griffin, is an homage to the singer-songwriter who goes by the same name.
• Chris is the only blonde in the Griffin Family. This hair color doesn't belong to either his mother or his father. The reason for this is because in the original pilot, Lois was intended to be blonde, before they changed her hair to be that of a redhead, and Chris' hair stayed the same color.
  • However, this is subverted as "Employee for Fire" reveals Lois' hair is still blonde, but she dyes it redhead.
• Chris is the first Griffin member to be absent in an episode, with him being absent for the first time in Season 3's "I Take Thee Quagmire"
• In the first three seasons, Chris wore gold hoop earrings on his ears. But after Season 4, he stopped wearing them. It wasn't explained until "Karma's a Bitch", when Meg asks what ever happened to them, and Chris explains he just didn't want to wear them anymore. Though compared to Peter's explanation to why the Griffin Living Room carpet has changed color, Chris still kept them in their box in his room and put them on to show his still had them, and they remained on him for the rest of the episode.
• In "Junior Sized", Chris gets a 2012 Surface tablet he uses for schoolwork and drawing. However, in recent years, it's been replaced with the newer Surface models
• Chris' birthday is February 8th as according to "German Guy", which is also Seth Green's birthday.
• He was called an elephant child in a newspaper article in "He's Too Sexy For His Fat" when he was born due to his enormous size.
• Chris is secretly a brony and a furry, as revealed in "My Little Brother", who finds the ponies from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, especially Rainbow Dash to be sexually arousing.
• Peter claims that Chris has Crohn's Disease in "Underage Peter".
• His star sign is Aquarius.
• Chris converts to Scientology in "Peterschmidt Manor".